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Showing posts from November, 2013

Reminiscence

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At times I feel like going back in the past.. Slow down the moments that vapourised so fast.. Retain the memories that wiped out at last.. It occurs to my mind when m sitting alone.. Lose a battle that've been deceivingly won.. Undo the acts dat shouldn't have been done.. I get so lost and wish with eyes shuttered.. Delete the words that shouldn't have been uttered.. Take back the promises that shouldn't have been muttered.. Drowned in the past, I gaze at the ceiling.. Cry out loud when I curbed my feeling.. Overcome the illusion and understand the meaning.. Alas! Its too late I cant go and act.. I still have the future to handle with tact.. I'll strive to be rational, I make this pact..

A broken heart

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A regular friend, with frequent meetings, Dunno how she became a special being, We had laughs and chit chat sessions, Still wondering I could think of her in this fashion.. We fought initially yet with frolic and fun, Her smiles made me feel she's the one, The then fights ended with laughter and cheers, They now ended up with regrets and tears.. I was neither a fanatic nor a lover, Dunno how, when, where i fell for her, I still controlled so as never to express, But the day came when I could no longer suppress.. I yelled it with frustration, anger and fear.. Emotions at their weakest with fear to lose her.. My fears came true, unwantedly, I had no option but to live depressively.. I knew she was somebody else's life, So I decided to make a sacrifice, It isn't as easy as said coz my heart cries.. I'm here, lonely, with life seeming like a bunch of lies.. She came back to make me strong again.. I am trying, failing and cannot sustain, She said my h

The river teaches

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I felt everything about the river was good.. Actually nothing except the river was good.. Life's ways were all entangled.. The heart and mind were at a wrangle.. Indeed.. The river always showed me the way.. But this time it has left me astray.. All the pieces of life were at fray.. Even the place I dwell was dark and grey.. Like.. The river meets but bades a salutation.. 'Cause it has to achieve a destination.. I thought they' were to give happiness an invitation.. But I guess it was paradox's definition.. Like.. The beloved rests in the river's soils.. But someday it faces the turmoils.. Similarly someone became a reason to smile. Gradually destiny was taking its toils. Though.. The river found its trail through pebbles and bays.. But now the bank awaits.. Think it has lost its ways.. All I can do is wait.. For a new light, a new hope and the same fate..

Envy

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Dashed through the window pane, the heat of the sun I woke up with the contemplation of a monotonous day I gazed the sky and admired its elements I envied the free bird for it had no boss over it to yell and cry, No responsibilities, no deadliness, just freedom. But.. I realized its responsibility to feed its child Its deadlines to protect its nest before the wind blew its existence in a jerk Its freedom caged by humans. I envied the dazzling sky studded with sometimes the sun or the moon and stars It had the glories which I aspired in the form of diamonds and medals. But.. I realized they were trivial before its lifeless vastness These glories were momentary during day or night but never forever I envied the charismatic sun that gave life and was the most powerful of all elements. It had the power I desired. Its presence was missed when it is not there But.. I realized even the one whom he loved was burned to ashes in its heat And there

The silent blood relation

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A relation which is taking transitions in every phase of my life.... The first phase .... I started with him as a friend... Sometimes my biggest enemy... But other times my partner in acts ... We have crossed moments of jealousy , revenge , greed... But they were just moments and ultimately we were building memories to laugh at when we reach the next phase ... Our eyes talked... There was a language building up its own vocabulary ... Jealousy took form of pride and greed, altruism ... He was not just a friend ... The other half of the life was not really good ... But he was by my side not apparently but latently ... There was a silent care ... I could sense it... But we don't need to express ... The bond grew to lead us through the third phase ... We still don't express ... We don't need words ... But its stronger ... He laughs at me but won't let anyone else do it ... I get angry with him but fearless anger ... Coz I know he won't leave ... N I know it won't l

Peace

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An Enigma simple yet having a meaning deeper than its simplicity, After everything you achieve from money, power, love , publicity... Ultimately you search for it, But you realize it only when you're at the convexity! Age is never a factor for the time to discover it... Its when you feel the descent in your personality... But where should you go in search of it... 'Cause your mind stops working with its intensity... Then you must realize... Its within yourself... All you gotta do is to calm yourself to find it in you obscurity... No art of living, no meditation... These are just ways to discover your own ambiguity... And when you find it, All the noise becomes music... all the yelling a euphony... You then feel the satisfaction of achieving the metaphysical entity... But for that you got to identify... Its not this materialistic world that you seeking... They are illusions to that entity... 'Cause ultimately... its only you... And all you have is this Peace... Fight your s

Shattering Relations

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Relations are so complicated… Sometimes you win but many times you lose, Your first love may make you feel intoxicated, Later on de same makes you suffocated. Once you want to leave everything for that person, Then you want to leave that person for everything. Every li'l thing you did mattered and made you happy, Gradually every li'l thing that you do still matters but makes you sad. Long chats, night talks that made you blush, smile, wink, laugh, What’s left is long nights but no chats or talks, making you yell, cry, think, past For every tear there was a shoulder to wipe them, Now the shoulder is the reason for the tear and no one to wipe them!!

Rendezvous with the Almighty

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I understand there is a power... But I never named it God... They ask me to look for it in the idols...But I fail... Although I feel it ... I talk to it… It responds to me too, in it's owns signs and symbols... Its omnipresence is a secret yet known to all... I know it favors me... but sometimes it doesn't... I fight with it ‘cause I cannot foresee the future... But It can... It warns me when I deviate... yet I do it... But it has a soft corner for me... ‘cause it handles it all... It has decided a fate for me which I want to see.. It gives me clues in my dreams... But silly me cannot interpret it.... Now when I’m talking to it... it is angry with me... I don’t know the reason... its thundering... But its like my beloved who cries with me when it is angry with me… And it’s raining.... I bade myself good bye to talk to it...

In search of myself

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A heavy heart, a feeble mind, yet I pretended everything is okay... They asked again, if anything went amiss, I hardly heard, but tried not to be dismay... I asked myself why am I not opening my heart, why keeping myself astray... Why people who knew me inside out, regarded me predictable, know nothing today... The answer was quick, Life taught me , bewared me, sometimes I notice most times it just passed away... The truth lies deep, nobody cares, its just your life and they are strangers with no say... They have their own lives, their own sweet bitter pain, and walk with you till you give them your hay... When the need of the hour comes, you start expecting, then they seem to be miles away... You keep pondering if they were really close, where did they go when you were at rocks, lost and sway... Everything happens for a reason, I failed to know then, I know it now without a delay... I lost trust to trust myself, remained aloof to know thyself, grew strong to prove myself